Michael Firstlight
Subscriber
This was a REAL exchange I had a few years ago (I am not kidding you, and unfortunately, isn’t uncommon in various forms).
I’m shooting a wedding as the hired photographer – about 120 guests. It is not uncommon for me and my assistant to have to do a lot of the coordinating of things when the couple doesn’t have a wedding planner/coordinator. As I’m arranging and shooting the bridal party, cousin Ralphy comes up behind me. He starts chimping away with his camera. I patiently ask cousin Ralphy to please wait until I am finished taking the shots that I am carefully arranging, but he hovers and keeps chimping away – very distracting. Now I don’t have a policy as some do about demanding that other guests not reuse my poses, but I have colleagues that are downright militant about that; guests are free to shoot away with their expensive toys – as long as they don’t interfere with my work.
Inevitably though, cousin Ralphy has to prove his worth as a ‘real’ photographer. I am not kidding you- I once had an exchange that essentially went like this:
Cousin Ralphy: “What lens are you using?”
Me: I ignore him – I am trying to arrange people and shoot. He starts pestering me
Cousin Ralphy: “What ISO are you using?”
Me: I ignore him – I am trying to re-arrange the group
This guy is literally starts running circles around me – I mean, he goes to my left, fires off a continuous series of frames, runs to my right, fires off a continuous series, goes low, goes high, chimping away. Thank goodness I use RF for my strobes or he'd be setting them off continuously. When I finished my group shots I get this:
Cousin Ralphy: “You know, I am a real photographer?” as he sports a $6000 camera body with a $2000 lens and a hot-shoe mounted strobe - pointed directly at his subjects no less
Me: Really? A real photographer 'eh?
Cousin Ralphy: “Oh yes”
Me: [Holding back from breaking out in laughter] "So, what's the name of your studio and where is it located?”
Cousin Ralphy: “Oh, I only do location shoots”
Me: “Are you a member of PPNC?”
Cousin Ralphy: “No, but I plan to be – what is PPNC? [PPNC is my State's professional association to which most of the pros in the State belong]
Me: “How many weddings do you do a year?”
Cousin Ralphy: “I’ve only done my aunt Alice’s daughter’s wedding so far”
Me: “Was it a church wedding and reception?” I quizzed him
Cousin Ralphy: “It was a backyard event”
Me: “So tell me, what do you think if the inverse square law”?
Cousin Ralphy: “I forget what that is, I used to know it once”
Me: “Un huh”
Cousin Ralphy: “But I don’t charge for my work yet; I’m just building my portfolio”
Me: “Yah, I remember what that was like” I reply, trying mightily to keep a straight face, “Hey, how do you handle diffraction and the circle of confusion?”
Cousin Ralphy: “I don’t put my groups in circles – I stagger them”
Me: “Un huh, right"
I’ve encountered more Cousin Ralphy’s in my past than I can count. There's almost always one of them and I've learned how to deal with it, but there are you ‘real’ photographers. A self-respecting photographer, pro, pro-am, or enthusiast would never use the term.
Don't be a cousin Ralphy.
MFL
I’m shooting a wedding as the hired photographer – about 120 guests. It is not uncommon for me and my assistant to have to do a lot of the coordinating of things when the couple doesn’t have a wedding planner/coordinator. As I’m arranging and shooting the bridal party, cousin Ralphy comes up behind me. He starts chimping away with his camera. I patiently ask cousin Ralphy to please wait until I am finished taking the shots that I am carefully arranging, but he hovers and keeps chimping away – very distracting. Now I don’t have a policy as some do about demanding that other guests not reuse my poses, but I have colleagues that are downright militant about that; guests are free to shoot away with their expensive toys – as long as they don’t interfere with my work.
Inevitably though, cousin Ralphy has to prove his worth as a ‘real’ photographer. I am not kidding you- I once had an exchange that essentially went like this:
Cousin Ralphy: “What lens are you using?”
Me: I ignore him – I am trying to arrange people and shoot. He starts pestering me
Cousin Ralphy: “What ISO are you using?”
Me: I ignore him – I am trying to re-arrange the group
This guy is literally starts running circles around me – I mean, he goes to my left, fires off a continuous series of frames, runs to my right, fires off a continuous series, goes low, goes high, chimping away. Thank goodness I use RF for my strobes or he'd be setting them off continuously. When I finished my group shots I get this:
Cousin Ralphy: “You know, I am a real photographer?” as he sports a $6000 camera body with a $2000 lens and a hot-shoe mounted strobe - pointed directly at his subjects no less
Me: Really? A real photographer 'eh?
Cousin Ralphy: “Oh yes”
Me: [Holding back from breaking out in laughter] "So, what's the name of your studio and where is it located?”
Cousin Ralphy: “Oh, I only do location shoots”
Me: “Are you a member of PPNC?”
Cousin Ralphy: “No, but I plan to be – what is PPNC? [PPNC is my State's professional association to which most of the pros in the State belong]
Me: “How many weddings do you do a year?”
Cousin Ralphy: “I’ve only done my aunt Alice’s daughter’s wedding so far”
Me: “Was it a church wedding and reception?” I quizzed him
Cousin Ralphy: “It was a backyard event”
Me: “So tell me, what do you think if the inverse square law”?
Cousin Ralphy: “I forget what that is, I used to know it once”
Me: “Un huh”
Cousin Ralphy: “But I don’t charge for my work yet; I’m just building my portfolio”
Me: “Yah, I remember what that was like” I reply, trying mightily to keep a straight face, “Hey, how do you handle diffraction and the circle of confusion?”
Cousin Ralphy: “I don’t put my groups in circles – I stagger them”
Me: “Un huh, right"
I’ve encountered more Cousin Ralphy’s in my past than I can count. There's almost always one of them and I've learned how to deal with it, but there are you ‘real’ photographers. A self-respecting photographer, pro, pro-am, or enthusiast would never use the term.
Don't be a cousin Ralphy.
MFL
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