A joke I've heard in Aberdeen (that one shall say 'Ahbahrdeen'):
A getleman from England went to Scotland, purchased a kleg of pure malt and took it home.
When the kleg was finishing, he mailed the distillers asking for another kleg.
Reply:
"Sorry, Sir, but we do not have an export license..."
While drinking and tosting I've tried the translation to Italian: this altavista translator is a very funny thing. Most of its literal translation are meaningless but some are pretty amusing.