If I understand you correctly, I've done the same thing. Up in Washington I became so overwhelmed with autumn colors that I felt I was just repetitively making the same types of photos and still not capturing what I "saw".
One day last month I deliberately did not take a camera with me on my walks; this was difficult. At one point I paused and looked at the late afternoon sun backlighting the trees in someone's yard. The colors were spectacular and scintillating in a light breeze. I watched this carefully for over a minute, taking in every detail. Actually thinking of what you'd written in a thread long ago, I realized this memory would be better than any photo I could make - a photo which I would glance at only on few occasions. Later, I walked past a small tree, stopped, and looked at it. There were small red berries on it, illuminated by the sun - another image saved in my mind but not on film.