I suspect you'll have to use the same method that a lot of people use: Trolling through reviews on different films and developer combinations, and looking at online scans (which can be misleading). As Ralph mentioned, it will be subjective since one person's beautiful grain will be someone else's problem grain.
Tri-X developed 1+25 will do the job, it looked nice and grainy the few times I've tried it. Back then I was shooting Tri-X at box speed. A lot depends on the film format and lighting too. 4x5 Tri-X in Rodinal will look vastly different than 35mm.
This page contains a comprehensive list of equal films and developers. It also contains notes on current and outdated Kodak films as well as notes and fact sheets for several other developers and films.
I am slowly navigating my way through the maze of developer choices. Feel lucky we have so many! Based on my limited (always learning) experience, most people would benefit from always having 3 choices on hand:
Regular everyday developer for most situations. The normie.
Speed boosting developer for pushing. The pusher.
High detail developer. The sharpie.
Storing three separate solutions isn't practical for most though, especially if shooting infrequently. In terms of developer choices, I am very happy with Xtol as the normie. All films look either amazing or good in it, Xtol keeps well and it offers protection against over-cooking.
Microphen is my pusher of choice mainly for the convenience of 1L packs that facilitates infrequent use. Developing Delta 3200 in anything else is a tragedy IMO.
For the sharpie, I'm on the fence between Ilfosol 3 and Rodinal. Rodinal lasts forever and its grain is slightly more dense, but Ilfosol 3 offers a wider range of tones in an image and adds something special to the overall look that I can't put my finger on. If my experiment of storing Ilfosol in AstraPouch bags succeeds, it will be the winner.
I will conclude by re-iterating that using Xtol for everything all the time is also a fine idea.
A few more niche possibilities (as if 3 weren't enough) ...
'Rescue' developer. Have some found film or some Plus-X exposed in 1964 and want the best chance at getting an image? I use HC-110 with added anti-fog agent.
Reversal developer. This is a moot point if negatives are your goal, but the fact is that for most B&W films you need a (1st) developer tuned specifically for reversal. Stock Kodak D-19 (and to lesser extent D-11) can reverse just about any B&W negative film when used as-is as 1st & 2nd developer.
Replenish-able developer. One-shot is good and all but... sometimes the solera method is more effective. Xtol is the clear winner here, but I also replenish my D-19 (which has a wicked shelf-life btw).
Staining developer. This might also be classified as 'fine grain' but has real utility during enlargement or alt process contact printing. Also interesting as a second developer for B&W reversal. Pyro is the only game in town as far as I know, but there are many public available formulations each with their own subtle characteristics.
I'd pick HC-110 as regular, TMax Dev as speed booster, and Pyro for acutance.
Mmm... the "rescue" developer made me think of a use case when you find an undeveloped film canister without markings, i.e. you bulk-loaded something 5 years ago and don't know what that is? Which developer would you use to develop an incognito film?
Mmm... the "rescue" developer made me think of a use case when you find an undeveloped film canister without markings, i.e. you bulk-loaded something 5 years ago and don't know what that is? Which developer would you use to develop an incognito film?