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Planning a Roadie

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... planning a cross country summer road trip. Left coast to right coast of the lower 48 ... Bonus points for a good diner pie suggestions.

Oh, well then! When you drop down into New Mexico off the high ground, there used to be a real-live diner on the left in Tucumcari. Had great spaghetti there one dark night and all the time we were eating locals were slipping in straight to the pickup counter, then quickly leaving with takeout boxes like thieves-in-the-night. Found out oven-fresh, mountainous, coconut cream pies were inside those boxes, pies we have never seen the likes of before or since - impossibly-delicate chiffon topping hiding a filling and crust to die for when you finally got down deep! Had to wait 20 minutes for our batch to come out of the oven, then we high-tailed for Albuquerque, car a wonderful mess of pie droppings by the time we found a motel. Never have forgotten that delicious little memory, or the many more that year we went backroading across the USA with a stack of Gazeteers.

Enjoy the trip, Zebra, and that Tucumcari Diner Coconut Pie - and be sure to send me my Bonus Points.

Bruce
 
When your near home, on the Blue Ridge Parkway near milemarker 165 is the Tuggle Gap diner. It's a hole in the wall with the best coconut cream pie in the world.

Yeah photobum?? How tall is the chiffon? Bet Tucumcari's is. Only way to settle this issue is for Zebra to eat one (or more) of each, then send the winner his prize points!

Bruce
 
Don't turn down the local eatery for the big name chain store. The local places have unique food (could be considered good or bad) but you won't know until you try it.

Sure, I'll always go for the local place if it's open (see notes above on Pennsylvania and Spain). But equally if I can see from the menu that I'm not going to want to eat there because I've already TRIED the only local speciality -- such as mamaliga (corn mush) in Transylvania, or seafood fried in greasy, salty batter in much of the Southern USA, or indeed sickly-sweet desserts that I don't care for (the only seriously sweet stuff I really like is in India) -- then I'm grateful for the picnic.

Cheers,

R.
 
Bruce; Only a philistine or British born Frogophile would eat a coconut cream pie with a meringue topping. Real down home "American" made coconut cream pie has whipped cream topping. Protest denied. If you can't feel your arteries slam shut, why bother?

Jim
 
Bruce; Only a philistine or British born Frogophile would eat a coconut cream pie with a meringue topping. Real down home "American" made coconut cream pie has whipped cream topping. Protest denied. If you can't feel your arteries slam shut, why bother?

Jim

Dear Jim,

NOBODY would eat a coconut cream pie of any kind (or shoo-fly pie, or any of those disgustingly sweet concoctions) if they had ever had anything better -- which means almost anything. Pumpkin pie can however be excellent if you halve the sugar in any published recipe.

Cheers,

R
 
why bother with hotel or motel, rent a RV and enjoy your life for 10 days, or make that 15 days.

Good luck!

Alex W.
 
why bother with hotel or motel, rent a RV and enjoy your life for 10 days, or make that 15 days.

Good luck!

Alex W.

Dear Alex,

My wife's take on this:

Yes, you can enjoy it. I don't want to do the cooking and washing up, thank you.

Despite my earlier comments about low-end m/hotels, I think she's right.

Cheers,

R.
 
Anyone for Key Lime pie?

Yes DBP! But only if it's pale-yellow with no topping and makes your mouth pucker-up into a figure-eight! If it's green throw it into the nearest thick-walled lead container and run like hell.

And Jim, genuine whipped cream I assume? Real men eat that stuff straight out of the mixing bowl or drowned in egg nog, never diluted on top of a fu-fu eastern pie ... unless they do both.

Bruce
 
Roger,

I find it amazing that you actually enjoy eating in Arles. Of all of the meals, in all of France that I ate, I never encountered anything so disgusting as the garbage served in the various restaurants in the central square of Arles.

Never before did I encounter grey-colored Harticot Verts that made the Green Giant's canned variety look gourmet. I desparately hope to never again encounter such garbage.

Now I could discuss the fine cuisine I first eyed on my initial visit to London where on a Sunday afternoon one is left to the mercy of particularly nasty pub food. It was the first time I ever saw pizza with tunafish and pineapple topping. I dearly hope it is the last.

As to your 8 cross-country journeys in the US, it is clear that they were taken with blinders on and all pre-conceived prejudices intact.
 
Highway 6 of course. First stop: Tonopah where we can pig out on Mexican food and margueritas and sit on my patio. Then maybe you'd let me tag along until mid Utah with my teensy 14X17 or half plate 12X20. Stay on the Midland Trail until you get to John's place at the other end.
 
I say Route 66 as much as possible. And of course Route 66 comes straight through Tulsa, Oklahoma. I can promise fabulous bar-b-que and pleanty of great pies. I love sugar myself, but that's my downfall. Love to host you for a day.
 
Roger,

I find it amazing that you actually enjoy eating in Arles. Of all of the meals, in all of France that I ate, I never encountered anything so disgusting as the garbage served in the various restaurants in the central square of Arles.

Never before did I encounter grey-colored Harticot Verts that made the Green Giant's canned variety look gourmet. I desparately hope to never again encounter such garbage.

Now I could discuss the fine cuisine I first eyed on my initial visit to London where on a Sunday afternoon one is left to the mercy of particularly nasty pub food. It was the first time I ever saw pizza with tunafish and pineapple topping. I dearly hope it is the last.

As to your 8 cross-country journeys in the US, it is clear that they were taken with blinders on and all pre-conceived prejudices intact.

Dear George,

You have taken an aside about tapas and built a tottering edifice on it.

It is indeed hard to find good food in Arles but there is an excellent tapas bar in a side-street on the right as you go out towards the Espace van Gogh. Then again, I do not recall praising Arlesien food in general: you are putting words in my mouth, for the purpose of disagreeing with them.

Likewise, you will note that there is no praise of London food other than that tapas bar in my previous posts -- though I will make a further exception for Indian cuisine, which is superbly done in a number of small restaurants, including many in Brick Lane. These are also exempt from my stated observation earlier that most English restaurants are overpriced. I would however fully agree with your comments about the disgusting nature of some English (and indeed British) pizza toppings. For the worst pizzas in the world, I'd recommend Delhi and Malta.

In other words, the fact that I have had excellent tapas in London and Arles is no guide to anything else about the general state of restaurants in either place. You are not reading what I wrote: you are reading what you want to read, for the purpose of scoring points.

Finally, your point about blinders (I believe this is American for 'blinkers') and prejudices is simple nonsense. When I first drove across the country I had no preconceptions, because I hadn't done it before. I noticed a number of things such as very early closing of restaurants in some areas (seconded by another post in this thread); a failure to serve wine with meals in many places (you can hardly accuse me of making that one up), a severe shortage of good places to eat once you are away from the coasts and the big cities (a fact attested to by, among others, the American Bill Bryson in his book 'The Lost Continent'). and the depressing fact that if a motel described itself as 'American Owned and Run' it was normally a dump owned by xenophobic rednecks.

A moment's thought on your part might have led to the deduction that I stayed in countless American owned and run motels that were anything from satisfactory to excellent, but that these were not the ones with big signs outside saying 'American Owned and Run'. Why would any reasonable person do this, after all? The only reason to advertise a motel as 'American Owned and Run' is to appeal to those Americans who are as unpleasant as the owners and take 'American Owned and Run' as an automatic endorsement of quality, when of course it is no such thing. I would even go further, and throw this back in your face: 'American Owned and Run' is essentially racist code for 'You don't gotta deal with no stinkin' foreigners here'. If you find that attractive, I feel sorry for you.

As for my assertion that food in the South is lamentably often deep-fried in salty batter, I think that most of the world would agree with me, beginning with my wife and in-laws who are of course all American.

You are incredibly thin-skinned about your country, and take ANY criticism as anti-Americanism. In fact, it doesn't even need to be criticism: plain statements of fact whip you into the same fury. You have demonstrated this countless times. I suggest that this argues that you are the one who is blinkered and prejudiced: you have decided that I am anti-American, and therefore read everything I write in the light of your preconceptions.

It is true that I believe there are a number of things that are wrong with the United States. Two of the most obvious are its current choice of government and the fact that the richest and most powerful nation on earth cares so little about its citizens that there is no National Health service. If holding these views makes me anti-American, than about half the population of the United States is also anti-American.

There are other things that are wrong with the rich world in general, such as lunatic materialism, and yet other things that are wrong with far too much of the world, rich or not, such as a tendency to religious fundamentalism. Again, the United States is a long way from exempt from either of these criticisms -- yet I would bet that you will take even this statement as anti-American.

Why do I continue to reply to you? Because I do not care to be mis-labelled as a bigot and a fool. Even if (as seems likely on past performance) I cannot persuade you that honest comment is not anti-Americanism, yet I may hope to persuade others of it.

Cheers,

Roger
 
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Truly humbling, the palatal worldliness of some of our more internationally-able members ...

... but Roger, didn't you ever leave the high road, your bedbug-free motel for a typical, back-road, Southern eatery? Veggies cooked hours and hours in recycled used peanut oil? (A joke, butter of course.) Mouth-watering green beans and ham, pork chops, cornbread, fried okra, the backward ambience of the South: dead cockroaches stuck to the oily residue on the walls and ceilings, live ones crawling across the dirty linoleum floors and your dirty table, house flies buzzing over the fresh coconut-cream pies in the display case and over your plate - in your sugary-sweet iced tea.

We have some effete walnut-paneled international-class restaurants down in this backward corner of the States, but cautious continental tourists and very rich rednecks are all you ever see inside when you peek thru the window on the way down to Betty's Place.

I say ol' bean, could someone gimme me another slice of pie? Reddiwhip on top and hold the flies!

Bruce
 
on the way down to Betty's Place.
Dear Bruce,

The catch lies in knowing where Betty's Place is. They exist everywhere. But usually, a place that looks awful, smells awful, sounds awful, is... well... unsurprisingly... awful. Greasy fried catfish in Moscow, Tennessee spring immediately to mind. And sorry, but iced tea (any iced tea) makes me throw up.

After years visiting Selma, Alabama, for instance, I have yet to have a good meal, though the St. James (opened a few years ago) is a major improvement over the previous best, Major Grumbles (that's what it's called, not my opinion of the place).

Cheers,

R.
 
Dear Bruce,

The catch lies in knowing where Betty's Place is. They exist everywhere. But usually, a place that looks awful, smells awful, sounds awful, is... well... unsurprisingly... awful. Greasy fried catfish in Moscow, Tennessee spring immediately to mind. And sorry, but iced tea (any iced tea) makes me throw up.

After years visiting Selma, Alabama, for instance, I have yet to have a good meal, though the St. James (opened a few years ago) is a major improvement over the previous best, Major Grumbles (that's what it's called, not my opinion of the place).

Cheers,

R.

what a food bigot. You don't have to come back! And from what I have seen of the food in the UK you have nothing to talk about.

lee\c
 
what a food bigot. You don't have to come back! And from what I have seen of the food in the UK you have nothing to talk about.

lee\c


Dear Lee,

Liking good food (or disliking iced tea and fried catfish) does not make anyone a bigot. I did say that 'Betty's Place' (shorthand for somewhere good and cheap) exists everywhere, but can be hard to find.

There are other reasons for visiting a place than culinary excellence. If there weren't, most of the world (with the USA and the UK not far from the lead, it is true) would do a good deal worse from tourism. But for example, have you ever BEEN to Transylvania? Or for that matter, Selma, Alabama?

Nor do I live in the UK.

Apart from that, all your criticisms make perfect sense.

Cheers,

R.
 
The catch lies in knowing where Betty's Place is. They exist everywhere. But usually, a place that looks awful, smells awful, sounds awful, is... well... unsurprisingly... awful. Greasy fried catfish in Moscow, Tennessee spring immediately to mind. And sorry, but iced tea (any iced tea) makes me throw up.

Roger, sooooo much we could talk about, especially greasy catfishes in six-hour-old-crusts ... but this is a forum and a modicum of brevity is in order.

So Zebra has the gauntlet now! Will he find Betty's Place? Will he during his trip throw up? Will he die of too much peanut oil? Will he, in fear of food and bedbugs, forget to take a single photo-graph or clandestine digital image during his Great Trek? You, me, all of us, will eagerly await his official report sometime down the - as it were - road.

One thing I must find out from you: Hot tea alright? One lump or two?

If you answer: "yes" and one of the following words: none, one or two - or just plain "no" ... you PASS. If you answer: "The only hot tea I've found satisfactory to me was the luke-warm Tibetan tea served to me at the Palace in Lhasa back in 83 when I was visiting the Dalai Lama when His Holiness and I were discussing how Tibetan Buddism varies from Vajrayana blah blah blah" ... You FAIL!

Best of luck completing the above test. It'll be tough, but I know you can do it having survived us!!

Bruce
 
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And here I thought my little query had run its course. As to the gauntlet, such challenges can do nothing but enhance ones existence. I might add the same could be said for surviving the arrival of six legged stowaways so insert the obligatory "Badges, we don't need no stinking badges!" quote here in regards to any inspections of beds. I throw my lot in with those that believe a certain randomness is good for the soul. Besides this a a trip filled with 20 x 24 Wet Plate Collodion in tow so any creature great or small that can survive the chemicals that are sure to be oozing from my pores deserves a ride along side me for the duration of the trip. As to Betty's Place consider it done as well of course with our little hamlet in Tucumcari and the Tuggle Gap Diner. Bonus Points will arrive forthwith upon my return but alas this is a early summer trip so I beg of you patience but fear not I am on it!!

As to you Bruce--anyone that can tickle the keyboard with such dexterity has a place at our family's dinner table anytime. If you can survive my two youngin's I make up a mean salsa and a fair to middlin' triple by pass turkey burger --Hey you marry a quasi vegetarian you can only go so far at the homestead ya know.

Thanks for all the replies and Gay if I make it down through Tulsa and you have dug out of that snow storm by then I'm gonna take you up on that offer of a day guide through the photo safari of Route 66

Continued success all,

I remain,

Monty Betty's ever lovin'
 
One thing I must find out from you: Hot tea alright? One lump or two?


Oh dear -- I fail! My parents were the first in their generation in their respective families to have a child, so I'm the oldest of about eight or ten brothers/sisters/cousins. They were worried about the effects of tea and coffee on the new baby (me) so never gave me either until I was about three. As a result, I never acquired the taste and don't drink the stuff.

Except (and you may find this all too easy to believe) that if I HAVE to force tea down, in order to be polite, I actually do prefer Tibetan butter tea to 'Inji' tea.

But on the numerous times I've met HH Dalai Lama (you know I wrote a biography of him?), we've never drunk tea together.

Cheers,

R.
 
Oh dear -- I fail! My parents were the first in their generation in their respective families to have a child, so I'm the oldest of about eight or ten brothers/sisters/cousins. They were worried about the effects of tea and coffee on the new baby (me) so never gave me either until I was about three. As a result, I never acquired the taste and don't drink the stuff.

Except (and you may find this all too easy to believe) that if I HAVE to force tea down, in order to be polite, I actually do prefer Tibetan butter tea to 'Inji' tea.

But on the numerous times I've met HH Dalai Lama (you know I wrote a biography of him?), we've never drunk tea together.

Cheers,

R.


Roger,

What is amazing about this entire thread is how you've told us you've crossed the US eight times(yes, 8) and seem to have had nothing but bad food and motel experiences.

One simple question, most of us learn that "once burned, twice shy". Yet, EIGHT TIMES! Talk about the school of hard knocks.

Jeez, man, you keep coming back for more and more abuse - again and again and again - what's it going to take? :confused:
 
Roger,

What is amazing about this entire thread is how you've told us you've crossed the US eight times(yes, 8) and seem to have had nothing but bad food and motel experiences.

One simple question, most of us learn that "once burned, twice shy". Yet, EIGHT TIMES! Talk about the school of hard knocks.

Jeez, man, you keep coming back for more and more abuse - again and again and again - what's it going to take? :confused:

Dear George,

You're doing it again. I didn't say I had nothing but bad experiences; I specifically said (for example) that I had stayed in American owned and run motels that ranged from adequate (or satisfactory) to good (or even excellent): they were just the ones that didn't have big signs outside saying AMERICAN OWNED AND RUN.

I also suggested, in my original post, ways of avoiding the bad and seeking the good. To no-one's surprise except perhaps yours, I have managed (by application of this advice) to diminish the number of bad experiences to the point where I would not be unduly averse to trying a 9th trip.

When taking an examination, one is generally advised to read the question before attempting an answer. You might care to try something similar before your next attack on me.

Cheers,

R.
 
Dear George,

You're doing it again. I didn't say I had nothing but bad experiences; I specifically said (for example) that I had stayed in American owned and run motels that ranged from adequate (or satisfactory) to good (or even excellent): they were just the ones that didn't have big signs outside saying AMERICAN OWNED AND RUN.

I also suggested, in my original post, ways of avoiding the bad and seeking the good. To no-one's surprise except perhaps yours, I have managed (by application of this advice) to diminish the number of bad experiences to the point where I would not be unduly averse to trying a 9th trip.

When taking an examination, one is generally advised to read the question before attempting an answer. You might care to try something similar before your next attack on me.

Cheers,

R.


Roger,

It is certainly not my intent to "attack" you. Reading through your posts on this thread they are generally quite negative about the food you've encountered during eight cross-US journeys!

You characterized an entire region of the US (i.e. the South) as offering nothing more than "salty battered" deep-fried food.

As to lodging, I can honestly say that I have never stayed in a motel that made of point of claiming to be "American Owned and American Operated". Then again, I tend to favor the chain motels as much as I avoid chain food emporia.

But what is most frustrating is your approach to the OP's query. Whereas most posters made recommendations of what to do, where to eat etc.; you chose, as is often the case, to "accentuate the negative".

You told the OP what to avoid, not what to enjoy. Your entire approach arose from a position of negativity. And it's one reason why it was perceived as anti-American.

Perhaps you might want to consider some time, telling us what you liked during your eight sojourns across the U.S.?
 
You characterized an entire region of the US (i.e. the South) as offering nothing more than "salty battered" deep-fried food.

And again! I said that I had come across all too many places where the food was bad, especially in the South, etc. That is not a blanket condemnation, unless you are determined to read it as such -- as you are, and as your countless references to me as anti-American bear witness.

Yes, I focused on what to avoid. Consider the possibility that the rest was automatically assumed to be enjoyable or at least interesting, otherwise I'd have said 'Don't bother', and given reasons for not bothering.

The point of a road trip for most people is that you don't really know what you are going to find. Avoid the bad stuff, and the rest will fall into place. My understanding was that the OP did not want an orderly procession from one tourist trap or beauty spot to the next, staying in chain motels. I tried to give the best advice I could, based on my own 8 trips.

You, and a few others who are determined to find insults to your country in everything I say, didn't like the advice. Tough. I do rather wish I had not tried to be helpful, but then, you probably won't believe that I was trying to be helpful because you are permanently disposed to believe the worst of me. There really is very little point in our continuing to correspond, except, as I said earlier, that if I don't respond to your attacks -- and they are attacks -- some people might mistakenly think I have no answers to your arguments.

R.
 
Monty,
If you happen to make it to the St. Louis, MO area, I'm sure we can find lots for you to photograph.

Diane
 
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