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Pieter12

Pieter12

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Only what I would do.
All you have to do is have a will. No need to distribute before you die, unless you want to. The recipients will put the photos in a drawer until after you die, then they'll put them in the trash.

Forty years ago when my grandmother died, my aunt cleared out all her jewelry the next day. I didn't think that was fair. So I called my attorney and asked what happens in the situation where there is no will yet there's jewelry in the deceased house. He said whoever gets there first, gets the jewelry.
Yeah, if there's no inventory beforehand, who's to say what was in the estate?
 

MattKing

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Forty years ago when my grandmother died, my aunt cleared out all her jewelry the next day. I didn't think that was fair. So I called my attorney and asked what happens in the situation where there is no will yet there's jewelry in the deceased house. He said whoever gets there first, gets the jewelry. :blink:
That is, of course, theft.
It is just difficult to deal with.
And that was horrible and incorrect legal advice, even if it may reflect a practical reality.
 

Sirius Glass

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Forty years ago when my grandmother died, my aunt cleared out all her jewelry the next day. I didn't think that was fair. So I called my attorney and asked what happens in the situation where there is no will yet there's jewelry in the deceased house. He said whoever gets there first, gets the jewelry. :blink:

It happened in my mother's side of the family. One aunt cleared out the most valuable items in the safe deposit boxes even though the wills specified each item had been designated to various other people. When challenged she gave it all to her son. It was never straighten out.
 
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Pieter12

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How will you know when the time is right?
If you are lucid and know you have a fatal condition, like Bret Weston did, it is not that difficult. And then there's assisted dying. But most are not either lucid enough or physically capable of the act of destroying their property before they die. But once you dead, it's all moot.
 

Sirius Glass

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Have you ever noticed selfish dying people get? Do they ever go around to friends, acquaintances, coworkers, relatives and neighbors to check on which day would be the best to be their last day? They never take into account of how will affect weekend, holidays, vacation, ski trips, weddings, birthdays, ... No they just off themselves whenever they damn well please!
 

BrianShaw

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Same here except a few steps further - I plan to dispose of absolutely everything I have (besides whatever cash I have which goes to my brother). That way nobody has to deal with anything.
A cleanly written trust and will can also make things easier for those you leave behind. But don’t kid yourself… even with planning to the extreme, there are always residual issues to deal with. I’m sure that you know that. :smile:
 
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Pieter12

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Have you ever noticed selfish dying people get? Do they ever go around to friends, acquaintances, coworkers, relatives and neighbors to check on which day would be the best to be their last day? They never take into account of how will affect weekend, holidays, vacation, ski trips, weddings, birthdays, ... No they just off themselves whenever they damn well please!
I think it's the other way around. Society and religion have certain expectations and rituals the living have to perform for the dead. When I die I won't care a whit who shows up, if anyone. Of course, there was just an episode of "Curb Your Enthusiasm" where Albert Brooks has a "Live Funeral" while he is still alive so he can enjoy the attention.
 

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The general truth is that people living in poverty, who have no possessions of immediately obvious monetary value, don't write a will. She had no reason to expect that she owned anything of value to anyone else.
Getting a lawyer for making a will (or even ordering the "Home Will Kit" for $39.95, as seen on TV) costs money - that impoverished people can't spare. That, of course, leaves the possibility that she informally wrote a will and had it in her possessions, in which case it was either destroyed or "accidentally" destroyed (i.e., ignored). The people who originally went through the lockers did throw away a great deal of stuff.
 

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So it is all about her taking photography as the topmost priority and here she is, talk of everywhere
 
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Pieter12

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Some don't share their work for fear of criticism. It could be the case with her...just speculation, of course, among the many factors at work here. Hoarding, introversion, alienation.
 
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That is, of course, theft.
It is just difficult to deal with.
And that was horrible and incorrect legal advice, even if it may reflect a practical reality.
Well, he was representing it to me as a practical reality. After all, how is anyone going to prove what jewelry was in the house or not at the time fo death? The "recipient" would just claim their mom gave them the jewelry before she died. Plus it would have meant big family argument. Who needs that for some baubles someone felt they were owed and deserved? So I laugh at it.
 
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It happened in my mother's side of the family. One aunt cleared out the most valuable items in the safe deposit boxes even though the wills specified each item had been designated to various other people. When challenged she gave it all to her son. It was never straighten out.
Never give family heirlooms to sons. When they get married and then divorced, their unrelated ex-wives get it all, not the grandchildren. Only give these things to daughters to assure grandchildren get them. :wink:
 

warden

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Never give family heirlooms to sons. When they get married and then divorced, their unrelated ex-wives get it all, not the grandchildren. Only give these things to daughters to assure grandchildren get them. :wink:
I have sons but unfortunately forgot to make daughters. :smile:
 

MattKing

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Leave your stuff to your grandkids.
If they haven't reached adulthood, that requires setting up and administering a trust, which on our side of the border adds a significant level of expense and administrative headaches.
I have sons but unfortunately forgot to make daughters. :smile:
Follow Alan's lawyer's advice - just steal some from a recently deceased person :whistling:.
 

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The best and most reliable plan is to just have nothing when you die, like Stephen Foster.
 
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