Hi Doremus, That actually IS two separate images that Nige has posted; merely combined into one image to keep them right up against each other for a good side by side comparison.
The diagonal line shows very clearly that something has been bumped between exposures. I don't think focus is an issue because, beneath the two slightly offset exposures, one can still see either film grain or building texture.
I'm with Nige, definite movement there.
Other than that, just the opening up of that bottom left shadowed area and less of the 1.5 grade exposure around the freize to give those details better contrast and clarity and you're pretty much there, Brian. Well done! ☺
By the way, if I'm making a direct replica of another print for someone, I put the original print in my easel and focus the negative on that. That way the crop and any sort of tilt/straightening can be exactly matched very easily.
Nick's Print:
View attachment 411977
Brian's Print:
View attachment 411978