Most useless photographic accessory

[cliveh]

What is the most useless photographic accessery you could, or have ever bought? Apart from a film squeegee, I would say a soft shutter button is completely useless.

 

[Vaughn]

Loupe for LF. Bought one and used it a lot until I lost it. Have not missed it these past decades. Discovered that being so dang near-sighted, I see the image on the GG better without my glasses than I do using a loupe with my glasses on.

 

[MattKing]

What is the most useless photographic accessery you could, or have ever bought? Apart from a film squeegee, I would say a soft shutter button is completely useless.

Whereas for me, with restricted dexterity in my right hand, an extended (soft?) shutter button makes it possible to more easily use some cameras.
A lot of "useless" accessories are just not well matched to some users' needs.
For example, a high speed motor drive on a 35mm camera would be useless for me.
I've bought camera bags that looked like they would be perfect, but ended up being a poor fit when I tried to adapt them for my use. Usually I've bought them used, so the pain was manageable.

 

[cliveh]

A selfie stick

 

[gbroadbridge]

A selfie stick

Admitting that is brave

 

[cliveh]

Admitting that is brave

I didn't buy one, I'm just suggesting.

 

[oneeyedpainter]

Can anyone beat an 8-dioptres lens?

OneEyedPainter

 

[thinkbrown]

Can anyone beat an 8-dioptres lens?

OneEyedPainter

....a 9-diopter lens?

 

[film4Me]

Accessory self timers with insufficient travel to trip the shutter on old folders.

 

[benderscameracorner]

Pistol grip for an RB67. I didn't buy it, in my defence, but was given it with a bunch of other stuff.

I mean, it does make the chonky Mam' a more manageable melee weapon, should you have the need ;-)

 

[MurrayMinchin]

Tripod with a centre column that can't be removed (won't go low to the ground) and legs that can't move independently.

It was the first one I owned and got thrown into the middle of a river.

 

[BAC1967]

Those cheap plastic accessory shoe levels that aren't actually level.

 

[Big G]

One of those big square Linhof lens hoods -- the one that uses spring pressure to stay on the lens and has a slip-in circular filter holder. It doesn't fit any lens I own, large format or otherwise. It also wasn't cheap.

 

[Don_ih]

How about the Never-Ready case? You know, the form-fitting case that fits the camera if you use the "normal" lens (no other)? Then, if you want to use the camera, you have half the case dangling below the camera like an ugly bib?

They're even better for TLRs, since almost every one of them breaks apart at the seams when you need to remove the camera to reload film.

 

[Ian Grant]

Misread the title

Ian

 

[neuromantism]

I second (most of the) motor winders for 35mm film cameras in the present age. Some could argue that some camera models can benefit from an extended grip... But I guess that they never use them loaded if it's still possible to maintain the camera operation.

 

[Laurent]

For me, strobe flashes. I bought at least three, barely used one...

Same, macro mount for strobe flashes . ..

 

[grant.goodes]

How about the Never-Ready case? You know, the form-fitting case that fits the camera if you use the "normal" lens (no other)? Then, if you want to use the camera, you have half the case dangling below the camera like an ugly bib?

Well, I'm one of those rare individuals who love(d) using these camera cases for my Nikon FE/FE2. I had both the normal snout for my 24mm lens, and a longer snout for my 105mm. Sure, changing film meant taking the bottom of the case off, but I shot 36exp rolls, and I'm not using a motordrive, so that wasn't more than twice a day max, even under the most active shooting days. I used the case like a self-contained camera-bag, and with it on my camera, could either shoulder-carry or just jam it into whatever backpack I was using without worry that my gear would get trashed. When in "active shooter" mode, I would remove the snout and shove it in a pocket or backpack, so didn't suffer from the horror of "dangling". So for me with a mostly one-lens-at-a-time setup, the case worked really well, since I never had a formal camera-bag.

In the modern era, these cases have mostly disappeared, and the aftermarket just produces half-cases. For my Df, I have a really nice half-case with a metal bottom and a door that allows access to the battery/memory-card. I sometimes miss "the snout", but am just using a felt lens bag shoved on the lens when I'm in "jam it in the backpack" mode.

 

[foc]

Apart from a film squeegee, I

Who said a squeegee is useless??
Oh ye of little faith.

 

[snusmumriken]

Over the years I have made quite a few purchases that might have been OK for someone, but to me proved useless. A flashgun. Orange and red filters. Film-end retriever. Ball-and-socket tripod head. Hand-held meters. An Ilford enlarger exposure meter.

I expect there were more. But never a soft shutter button! Especially not a red one.

 

[tcolgate]

The plastic tongs that everyone seems to sell in darkroom starter kits (patterson I think?). Absolutely useless. They have a click close feature that mostly seems to exist to annoy me, and that assumes they dont crack after your first use (OK, a couple of pairs lasted a bit longer than that). They do have the advantage of being insanely expensive for what they are, meaning it's not a mistake I'll be making again any time soon.

 

[tcolgate]

... Film-end retriever ...

Yes. You win. Not only useless, but will drive you insane until you finally give in and admit it. If I absolutely have to retrieve a leader, licking an old strip of negative and shoving that in the canister tends to work much better (I appreciate it'll probably poison me, but a film retriever will send me crazy faster).

 

[grant.goodes]

Controversially for me it was a camera-bag! Every photographer I knew treated a camera bag as the most important accessory to reflect their style, much like a woman's dress purse, and spent a LOT of money on it. I bought a decent one, but quickly found it awkward to use in the field, and it just encouraged me to carry too much stuff so was a boat-anchor at events like rock festivals, not to mention it attracted undue attention to my gear from potential thieves. I still have that original bag, and did use it for storage at home, but it has been replaced by some nice vintage Nikon aluminum hard-cases (in cheerful yellow, with the 70's era Nikon script emblazoned on the sides) so the bag now sits empty in my cupboard.

 

[mcfitz]

Most camera bags that that have the form of a sling. I've only ever seen ones that are made with the intention the bag will go over the left shoulder, slinging the bag to the right side for "easy access" - IF you are right handed.
Which I am not.

Sling the thinng over the right shoulder and the balance is off completely, and the openings hard to access.

Also, most camera bags or camera backpacks seem to be designed for the shape and morphology of men. The back length is too long for most women, and the hip straps intended to help support the load of a heavy bag do not sit correctly for the proportions and morphology of most, if not all, women.

As a left handed not very tall woman, I've designed and made a few of my own camera bags to suit my purposes. But it would be lovely to be able to have a choice to select from, ready made in adapted materials. Not gonna see that in my lifetime though.

 

[Kino]

My most useless photographic accessory is the one I forget to pack in my camera bag when I head out the door.

That encompasses a lot of things...