I like my paper negatives to have both shadow and highlight detail clearly visible. Usually this means the negative's tonal range needs to have less contrast than the subsequent print or positive image would. I've found if the highlights are too dark in the negative, they rarely hold up well as a positive, regardless whether scanning or wet printing.
I agree that you can't tell a good paper negative by the image coming up in the tray, especially if your developer is well-used and dark. But you can sometimes tell by the speed at which it comes up; but in general, inspection of the negative after processing is required.
Regarding paper fibers from the negative showing through in silver prints, I really don't see this much when using RC paper negatives. Hold the paper negative, emulsion facing you, up to a backlight - that's what the print paper sees when contact printing. If you can't see the paper fibers when backlit, it shouldn't show up in the print. Fiber-based paper negatives, that's another story.
~Joe