I've had limited experience but here's a long-winded explanation that might help a little.
Regular ND filters are solid neutral grey and are used to increase exposure. They are used to get longer shutter speeds or wider apertures for whatever reason the photographer deems appropriate.
Graduated ND filters are different. They are part clear and part ND with an area of graduation between the two parts. Mostly, they are used to hold back light from a subject within a specific area of the composition. For landscape photography, that's usually the sky or, sometimes, a body of water.
Both regular ND and graduated ND filters come in different strengths, made to increase exposure by a set number of f-stops. The strongest regular ND filter I've ever seen was one that would increase exposure by about 20 f-stops.
Graduated ND filters also come in various strengths but most are one, two or three stop filters. Some of them are round, screw-in filters generally evenly split with clear glass and ND glass with an area of graduation between. The most useful are square or rectangular filters that can be used in a filter holder or hand held in front of the lens. You can move the filter around, up and down as necessary to fit it in just the right area of the composition.
With regular ND filters, you can just meter through the lens and use autofocus unless it's a very strong filter. In that case, don't use autofocus and meter without the filter then set the shutter or aperture to compensate for the exposure.
With graduated ND filters, I've always made a meter reading without the filter and manually focused. I've then move the filter into position and did not set any exposure compensation at all. The only tricky part about using graduated ND filters is getting the line between the ND portion of the filter and the clear portion of the filter at the right point. It becomes easier with practice.
Hope I haven't confused you more than necessary.