Fear

I have a lot of myself invested in my photography. It used to be that I did it or myself, but the time has come where I need to start justifying all the expense in time and money, and it's payback time. I simply cannot afford just plunking down cash, plunking down cash, you get the drift. I have to have a return or it will literally become an unsustainable pursuit for me. Either I sell some prints and continue, or print for others, charge for it and continue. Or I don't and stop.
So far things have come pretty easily for me, but in this day and age when economy is slowing down, I really fear not selling enough, and that would be a failure for me. A huge failure. I constantly have to troll for the cheap and expired film. I try really hard not to spend too much money on photographic paper so I can balance the sheets some day.
That is pressure, and I work very very hard not to fail. But I am afraid of it, because it means I would have to stop or slow down significantly with the art that I love so much.
- Thomas

I fear being taken seriously. I sure as hell don't aproach anything that way, but often times people want to try to lump that weight on my shoulders, then get all offended when I'm not living up to their expectations. I think thats what the fear of success really is. Its not the success so much as the weight of being taken seriously, when often times, you feel like you REALLY lucked into the position. Its like at any moment, someone is going to shout fraud at the top of their lungs and then it will all go to pieces in smoke and flames. I don't think you could have a worse life than to taste greatness, then fizzle to nothing.

JBrunner said:

I have no fear. Not the testosterone driven kind of "no fear", but rather the kind that requires no energy to maintain.

The old experienced kind of no fear. Success? Failure? Same thing. Different day. Nobody under forty will get this, probably.

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no no, the difference is really easy. The food and beer is allot better when your winning!

Fear is a strong force. I have realized that it's something I can either agree with, or disagree with. For me, it's a choice - one I have made. When I agree with that "voice" that tells me to doubt who & what I am & do, it overtakes me to "steal, kill, and destroy". SO I don't. (Well, I'm working on that and making great advances. ) I have learned to agree with the Voice that encourages me to reach, and grow, and be more.

I really do believe (having graveled too long in fear, doubt, and unbelief) that the good advice to "fear not" is a choice we have to make - about so many things in life!

Saying you fear success alows you to think you have all the success qualities even though you are not successful. Fear is actually the wrong word. If you have fear for anything you should find a way to get over it. My greatest fears are technical problems and poor vision.
Dennis

The book "Art & fear" by David Bayles & Ted Orland addressed some of these issues for me. I was not fearful, but uneasy about my art work, both photography and painting. This reading helped.

bill

I am fearless, unless I am in a tight dark spot that I can't turn around in...then I totally lose it -- rationality completely gone.

But my photography -- lots of failures of many kinds. That's how I find the successes. Three months in NZ, hitch-hiking with a 4x5 with a major light leak -- returned several years later for 5.5 months with a 4x5 and a push bike, and got much better images than I would if the camera worked the first trip. I spent a full year fighting a major fogging problem with my carbon printing, no good prints for a year...found the answer and I am printing tonight (morning) and like what I see.

I'll be able to handle success...as long as it does not take up too much of my time.

Vaughn

Fear? Are you kidding?

Learning more than you thought you knew or could competently manage, is the price of failure. So I learn more from failure; however, I'm not afraid of the act, only the monetary cost. Yet, I am not a slave to materialism either. Materialism is a bargain compared to the price of success. I think the photographers that I have known, since I started taking pictures (in VietNam) in 1969, have, by-and-large enjoyed both. When you get to the top of any professional heap, as I did in 1989, you might fear failure more because you have farther to fall. Do you fear failure as a person or a photographer? Fear for yourself? Or your reputation as a craftsman? Have you, in fact, nothing better to do than fear your failure or success? But lest we fear to face the facts:
"Fear is the mind-killer." Frank Herbert, Dune.
"Work is the Curse of the Failure Class." (Robert Chapman, 2008)

Vaughn said:

I am fearless, unless I am in a tight dark spot that I can't turn around in...then I totally lose it -- rationality completely gone.Vaughn

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I am afraid that I am full of it...

vaughn

The only thing I'm afraid of is lose bowels...