Hi Mark
Before we frighten the OP away...
I get similar symptoms with my weston meters I have four and compare them with one another.
Exactly, one of the most frustrating parts of camera work is metering that does not make sense.
Part of the problem is that our subject matter, say a face, isn't flat. There are any number of possible readings a reflective meter may return. An incident meter though, used as the OP suggests will typically provide one.
An incident meter, in good repair, provides a reliable and objective reference point.
Having an objective reference point allows us to then judge, and learn, how a reflective meter behaves with various subjects and lighting conditions.
In short, we can remove some frustration.
If OP can judge zones off a neg OP has a densiometer or a scanner and can do sums.
We don't know how the OP is judging the negs, so I asked. Even if a densitometer is in play, the OP should understand that the exact placement of any zone from the scene, is in reality a variable, not a specific point or range.
Adams described one, others have defined different points. The exact density of any one point on the negative is irrelevant to the print.
OP needs to do experiments instead at 100, 200, and 400 to decide what gamma to develope negs.
Given what sort of wet printing and type of enlarger is to be used.
This is generic advice for mono portraits, or it was a few decades ago.
Yes, generic and old are both reasonable descriptions of that advice.
The exceptional VC paper we now have, to a great extent, allows us to ignore film gamma adjustments.
Not everyone likes Citizen Kane cine noir style of shadows?
The idea of going farther from box speed is to find the limits, to see what works. It is not to ignore testing the more normal ranges.