Developing paper is not like developing film.
With film, contrast is manipulated by changing development time. The denser areas of the negative are usually not developed anywhere close to the maximum density, rather just enough to "fit" the paper being printed on.
With paper, the development must be fairly complete so that the density in the print approaches the maximum possible in order to get a decent black in the print. Reducing contrast with paper by shortening development time just results in weak blacks, which is largely unacceptable.
To adjust paper contrast, you need a different contrast grade of paper or a completely different print developer that delivers more or less contrast.
In your case, I would simply use the filters needed to get the contrast you desire and develop the print normally to ensure good blacks.
Often, "too contrasty" prints just need a little judicious dodging and burning to get the highlights and shadows in the right place. This yields more separation in the mid-tones and is often a more satisfying solution than choosing a lower overall contrast.
If you get to the point where you have used the lowest contrast paper grade/filter available to you and still need less contrast, you can change to a softer-working print developer (Selectol Soft, Ansco 120, etc.) to get even more paper scale.
There are lots of threads here on reducing contrast with means other than filters (one active one here: (there was a url link here which no longer exists) that I and many others have responded to).
Best,
Doremus