Artistic crisis, mid-life crisis, or am I just bored?

David Brown

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My career/hobby as a black and white film photographer has spanned many years (45+) and several stages.

I have, as one might imagine, a lot of black and white film negatives. I am not sorry I took any of them, but I have reached a point where I do not need to ever expose another frame of film that looks like my existing work. I’m still doing it (as recently as over the past weekend) but the “wow” factor is gone.

When I go back through the old negatives, sometimes as far back as 45 years, there are glimpses of something else. An image here and there that is different. More abstract. More, well what, exactly?

I started a blog. Mostly for my own benefit, but I would be okay if someone else read it. I'm working through trying to re-invent myself as a photographer, and writing this stuff down helps.

Cheers,

http://canegrande.blogspot.com
 

Ian Grant

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It's good to go through these artistic crises, complacency leads to poor results and wasted time. I guess I've been there a few times over the years, the current one is more to do with other personal circumstances but needs working around.

Every so often you need to re-appraise and set new goals/projects to keep fresh. Sometimes forst though you need to go back colloate and show older work before you can leave it behind and go forward.

Ian
 

BrianShaw

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I know how you feel. I've been in a photo slump for about a year now. I'm finding other things to do and occasionally look at the gear with hope shtat I'll be inspired to use it again. These things happen. Reinventing one's vision might be the correct goal to deal with such a crisis. You are lucky to see a glimpse of something else in your old images; I'm still trying to figure out what 'something else" might be.
 

jp498

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I read the blog. Go back to stage 1 where you were learning about the worlds greatest photographers. You thought you could be one because you were inspired by them and it showed in your beach photo. It's got a Minor White / Paul Caponigro look to it. I love photo history. I get used photo books regularly, and sometimes those photographers styles either click with me or hit me pretty hard, and I'm inspired to go out and shoot. Not to copycat the photographer I read of, but to employ a little bit of their perspective or what I learned from they wrote or made for images.
 

Rick A

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Learn a new(alternate) method of printing. Learn to make emulsions and hand coat paper. Revisit your old negatives and reprint them. If you are burned out on shooting film, shoot a gun, it's a whole new perspective on seeing.
 
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My personal 'reset' is to grab the least complicated camera I have (pinhole or Holga), and just go shoot. I might shoot color film and just send it out to be processed.

Divorce five years ago sucked my creativity bone dry, and I didn't lift a camera for months. Somebody kicked me in the rear and just said to go shoot anyway. I did, using a Holga, and it helped! It's nice to let go of control and just explore where instinct takes us.

Best of luck, JDB.
 

Bruce Osgood

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It's been about a year since I entered the photo doldrums. I look at old prints, old negatives; nothing looks promising any more. I love photography, developing film, printing, I have 10 4x5 film holders loaded and ready, the camera gear in its' case, the tripod ready and I just can't get it going.

I told my wife last night today was going to be a day of photography. It is just about the nicest day we've had since last Fall and it's 2:30 in the afternoon and I sit here posting on APUG.

Well, tomorrows another day.
 

Rick A

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You and me both Bruce. For some reason I just can't quite get my gear out the door.
 

cliveh

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In the world of Zen photography (for nuts like me who believe this) you never get photo doldrums, just more relaxation about what you are doing. The great thing about photography is that you can spend most of your life taking pictures and in retirement spend more time reprinting the negatives, sometimes in different ways. Thus rediscovering something you didn’t notice in an image you took 20 years ago.
 

mgb74

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I think that some times, for some people, it's best to go out and "let the moment strike you". Don't have any preconceived notions of what you want to photograph and why. Other times, for some people, it's best to set out with a specific purpose. To know, in advance, what you want to accomplish.

So, if you've tried one approach and it did not work, try the other. In either case, perhaps simpler (camera, meter, one or 2 lenses) is better. If neither works, put the cameras away and focus on something else entirely. Don't force it; they'll be there waiting for you if/when you're ready. Since you're retired, you can do what interests you.

And why are you trying to "re-invent" yourself? Because you're bored or because there's something you want to do? Either is a perfectly valid reason, but it helps to know why.

Finally, consider attending a workshop to help get the creative juices flowing. Or, better still, teach one.
 

bsdunek

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Lots of good advice. I think the idea of going out with a Holga is a good one. It inspires me. No pressure because it may look like crap no matter what you do. It may also be new and interesting. Look at my gallery to see what I mean. We all have plateaus, sometimes it takes a while to find what to do next.
 

Jim Taylor

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I felt a bit like this at the start of the year, so I decided to tear down the wet side in the DR and replace the sink, which I've been meaning to do for ages... It's cracked and not big enough!

Since then, I've been itching to get back at it, seen photo opportunities everywhere, but since the DR is full of dust and debris from the works I'm doing, I dare not open any film or cameras...

It's made me realise what a diehard loner I am, and that I need my DR as an oasis away from the world.

I guess I was struck with a case of "the complacency of familiarity" and this has been just what I needed. I'm hoping to be back in by Easter and I can't wait!!!
 

snapguy

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fire

It is okay not to have the Fire Of Youth in your belly. You don't have to run the 100-yard dash every day. It's okay to run the Marathon. Take it easy. All that fine camera gear on the shelf is not reproaching you. Recently I was re-visiting some of the great photographers of my youthful days (think: Family of Man). My mood ranged from "I Wanna Throw My Cameras Away I will Never Be That Good" to "I Think I Will Get Out My 1960s Rangefinders Again," or "I Should Take That Old Folder Into The Desert."
I wonder if old retired race horses, or milk wagon plugs, think in retirement, in a gorgeous field of grass with no wants or worries. Do they ever think "at least I was good for something back then?"
 

benjiboy

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Sadly I can't have a "mid-life crisis" I'm too old for that
 

TheFlyingCamera

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MAYBE the thing to do is to just walk away from cameras altogether for a little while - try a totally different creative medium, like sculpture. Something you're completely unfamiliar with, whose process you have to learn from scratch and can't readily adapt your existing technical skills to. That will push you to think in a totally different method, and re-invigorate your creative thinking.
 

Tom1956

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Sculpture??? Stick with photography. Making idols is just fooling with mud.
 

cliveh

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I think this is very good advice.
 

Tom1956

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With post #18, I was actually leading into a point, rather than just wanting to be a smart-a**. I've been in the doldrums for years. But the other day I dug out this Colorvir kit that came with a load of darkroom junk a while back. A complete kit, totally unused. So I'm just going back to 1970 and start all over. Making pictures that look like they came out of 70's horror movies. Worth a try. Maybe that'll shake things up.
Why not order a bottle each of all the Edwal toners and start playing? You can't go on making Ansel Adams pictures and toning in Selenium forever. And what else are you going to do?--get a blasted digital camera and sit in front of the computer doing photoshop? I'd rather go to the dentist, myself. GL. You'll pop out of it.
 

Alan Klein

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Making pictures for yourself has little meaning after awhile. How many can you look at? How many can you hang? How many can you post on the internet?

Give them away. Take your best framed photos, (or make some) and gift them away free to friends and family. Watch their smiles and joy and you'll feel great with their appreciation. The added benefit is now your pictures will be hanging on their walls in their houses so you don't have to worry what happens to all your pictures after your gone. When they come visit, have them go through those pictures and ask which they like. Then giove them to them to take home and hang. When I visit my sister in Florida, she always points out the 16x20 picture I gave her and how it's her favorite. That makes me feel great. Hangs in the hallway for all to see.
 
OP
OP

David Brown

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You're just bored. You'll be alright.

Thanks, Tom.

Thanks, too, for all the comments, However, I may owe the community an apology. I was thinking that most had missed the "point" of the blog posts, until I went back and re-read them!

I am afraid that I over-edited and left out a very important sentence: I am bored. It's there in the draft on the word processor, but not in the blog. (or here on apug) I'm embarrassed.

There is no crisis.* The glass is half-full, not half empty. The point of the title of this thread, as well as the title of the first blog post, was supposed to be clever and rhetorical, and (oh, well ...)

I have written the next post, but it is "cooling" and I will take a fresh look at it later before posting. I need to be more clear!

I am trying to re-invent my photography, but it's all good and all positive. I am looking to do something new (to me) and I have a fair, but not totally formed idea of what it should be. I am just working through the ramifications of all that, as well as the logistics. And, writing it all down and getting feedback is part of the process.



* like Ben, I'm too old for a mid-life crisis - I bought a convertible years ago ...
 
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ann

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David,

See if you can find a copy (cd) of Estes's "Creative Fire", she discusses the circle of the creative process that we all experience.

Every few years I give it another listen as it brings home to me the continuing journery of an artistic process (including being bored)

Hang in there sport.
 

jp498

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Don't plan it out too much. Be like Calvin and Hobbes hurtling down a hillside (photography metaphorically) in a wagon/sled with no brakes.

I bought my mid-life crisis car when I was in my 20's before I got married, so I don't get that option when the time comes for a mid-life crisis if I even get one in.
 
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