These 2 images complete the series on the funeral of my friend's father, a retired Marine Corps colonel. I delayed posting them because of the presence of family members who I was able to crop out of all the others. A year has passed and the wounds have mostly healed.
It's an important moment, so I think you should focus on this composition. If anything, crop a little off the top, tone down the surrounding a little by dampening the tonality there, and lighten the portion where the hand-over is.
Because of the nature of the subject the involved onlookers are essential. They actually add to the message as they are involved and not onlookers in the detached sense of the word "onlooker". By comparison the other picture looks almost staged with the same people's heads cut off. pentaxuser
Yes, the other crop is probably a mistake. I think I was trying to evoke the memory of being a teenager and standing next to my mother as she was handed my father's flag. One feels very alone in that moment. All that exists are you and the man with the flag.