Upper right or lower left is emulsion side facing you. I usually load with the notches lower left, so that if for some reason I have a loaded holder and don't know what the film is, I can go in the darkroom and feel the edge without having to remove the sheet all the way from the holder.
In Davids case the lower left would be under the small flap that closes last and in Brians case the upper right would not be seen/felt until film was removed. I guess this will be true regardless of the film, I'm guessing all film is notched in the same place.
I am with Brian. No need to pull the darkslide all the way out - I pull it out only about 1/4 of the way out. I load my film with the darkslide closest to me and the flap furthest - i.e. with the notch on the top right corner.
not a dumb question and the link provided by roteague is excellent. I reverse the dark side and put it back in the film holder ( I insert it just enough to keep it from falling out) when ready to expose. This way you don't lose it which is very easy to do in the woods, clutterd areas and or on long exposures in low light.